Enter in. My creative journey into the heavenliness, into the heart of Love, where intimacy with my King overflows in ministry, mercy, missions, miracles, music, and mysteries.
"For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." Romans 8:15
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
He is who He says He is...
Most of us believe lies about Him. We think He doesn't see us or he's far away. We think He won't come through for us. We think He'll reject us so we don't get too close. We think He doesn't always provide. We think He's angry or disappointed with us. Oh we know who He is in our heads...its our hearts that get confused.
LIFE. Life can be hard. People can disappoint us and sometimes the people who are supposed to show us what God is like, our parents and those who are supposed to be caretakers and role models to us, tend to disappoint. Most of the time its completely unintentional. Hurting people hurt people and generally people do the best they can with what they have and what they've been given. You can't give away something you don't have...or something you've never been given or you've never allowed yourself to receive.
Most of us have experienced pain, some more than others. Painful things and painful places. Some people have suffered horrific things. Abuse, loss, abandonment, neglect, divorce, affairs, torture, torment, death, rape, trauma...What do we do with all that pain? A lot of us tend to bottle it up so deep inside that we forget about it and it just rots there affecting our lives without us even knowing it. Probably the people around us see it a lot more than we do and it can often result in even more pain and trauma. We don't know what to do with it so we just live life the best we know how... But that doesn't sound like abundant life to me. Does it to you?
John 10:10 tells us that the enemy comes to kill, to steal, and to destroy, but Jesus came to give us life and LIFE ABUNDANTLY.
Its really hard to live abundant life when your heart has vines of lies squeezing it to death. Lies about who God is and about who you are.
We have to give it to God. We have to let Him take us step by step through the process of healing, of sanctification, of growth towards life, of unwrapping the lies that try to squeeze life out of us, to kill us, and let Him set us free with His truth and His incredible love. We have to dive in with all we have to discover who He is...not just who He is in our heads. Our hearts are affected by everything that happens to us all our lives. Remember that car accident when you were 7? or the divorce that happened before you have memory of it? or that traumatic even when you were 25... chances are that it is still affecting part of you, a part of you that probably has misunderstandings about God, and part of you that doesn't know the real Jesus, the real Father who loves you unconditionally. He wants you to forgive and to let Him into those places...He wants to show you where He was in those difficult traumatic times you faced, what He was doing, what you were thinking and what the truth is... to bring healing freedom and comfort to you.
Some people think that once you "get saved" everything is peachy and you are now perfect and happy and healed and saved and set free. Well its true in part, but there is a working out of our salvation. There is a truth that sets us free as we step by step grow closer to Him and the knowledge of His love.
Oh how I love the journey. I love the process. No its not always easy. There are moments of frustration at times...sometimes I even want to give up. But truthfully I wouldn't trade the journey towards emotional wholeness I've had for ANYTHING in all of this world. You see...someone told me recently that "our experiences of God are meant to be pathways to God". Every experience of Him that I have had...leads me closer to His heart and makes me fall more deeply in love with Him. OH HE IS SO GOOD! HE IS SO SWEET AND KIND AND WONDERFUL. HE LOVES ME SO MUCH. MORE THAN I CAN EVER FATHOM.
My journey towards inner healing started almost 10 years ago. I had a pretty painful childhood...though there were many happy moments...in general I was struggling as a kid. Constant disappointment and let downs by those who were supposed to love me gave me a very warped perception of myself and of God. Emotional abuse and neglect left me broken. I remember the first time I saw an image of Father God's face during a time of prayer ministry. I will never forget it. It was the kindest most loving face I had ever seen in my life. I cried like a baby as I felt waves of His love wash over me. Now I get to see His face all the time whenever I want. I can ask Him questions and He will answer. I can talk to Him and He can talk to me. He can hold me and snuggle with me and make me feel safe and loved. I can even cry in His arms if I need to. Come on. Gosh there was a time in my life I didn't understand all of this. When it would've sounded crazy and foolish and fake. There was a time when I knew God the Father...but I didn't know He was MY FATHER, MY DADDY. That I was His beloved cherished daughter. Oh no...I had no clue about it. I knew He loved me and that He was God but I didnt know He was My Dad. No one had ever told me that before. So if no one has ever told you that...
Im telling you now. God is Your everything. You belong to Him. He is Your PERFECT Heavenly Father who loves you more than you can imagine. He bought You with His blood with the ultimate selfless act of love that sent shockwaves through all of history and time and space and heaven and hell. He loves you. He wants you. He wants you to know how much you are loved. How special you are. Oh He is so so good.
...and friends it's a journey!!! I believe until we die...like all life long relationships. A journey of discovering more of His love, more of His truth, more of His freedom. There is a place in me still learning to trust Him at the moment...and I love it! I love that there will be a time when I will know His love in a greater more powerful way. A day when I will see His face and His heart from a new angle...and I'll just fall more in love with HIM! OH HE IS SO GOOD!!!!!!!!!
(If anyone reading this feels like oh I really need to get prayer and counseling ministry for something I went through or Im going through please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and I'll give you all the resources I have)